My Fault

The song “My Fault” by Shaboozey and Noah Cyrus will pull on the heartstrings of many. It will really hit the spouse of an addict hard as it accurately describes the general feelings and emotions of both parties. Listen to the regular version here first and then read the lyrics with the insertion of real thoughts, words, actions and moments from my life.

 

(Wife)

Is it my fault you’re lost?

It’s hard for me to see you when you’re drunk

In a bathroom stall cold garagetakin’ pills puffin smoke, givin’ up

You’re tryin’ find your friends peace but it’s too dark

Tell me how you’re getting home leaving soonyou took the car to another hotel room

Try to call me before you’re passed out in the yard bed

Feeling low, getting high, where did everything go wrong?

You say that it’s the universe everything is fine and blame it on the stars my heart

 

(Alcoholic)

Yeah, I can only handle heartache

When there’s bourbon whiskey in my hand

If I had to relieve all the hard days, I would not do it all again

Because I’m getting better at the bar games sneaking in

Should have been a better man

So don’t you keep on trying to fix me [instead “just leave me alone”]

You’ve done everything you can [and “I resent you” in the end]

But this road you led me down of forced therapy and hopeful recovery is too long

It ain’t nothing like the streets of drugs, alcohol & abuse that I grew up on

When I beg you not to go, “I’m prepared” you’ll leave again [like they all have]

Well, I guess I wasn’t enough in the end.

 

Is it my fault you’re lost? [because you can’t decide to stay or go]

It’s hard for me to see you when you’re drunk hurt

In a bathroom stall the housetakin’ pills crying, giving up

You’re trying to find your friends some hope but it’s too dark

Tell me how you’re getting home outyou took yes just take the car

You call text me desperate pleas before you’re passed out as you toss and turn in the yard other room

Feeling low, getting praying high, where did everything go wrong?

You say that it’s the universe my fault and blame it on the stars booze

 

(Wife)

Well, I made up my decision

When you and me were sitting, barely living

Co-existing, drifting slowly into dust

[but then I questioned whether I could live without you]

With you I’m only getting

Eden or Armageddon

So I’m beginning to forgetting the last memories of us

[I’m trying to be strong and let go]

Cause this road of addiction you led me down is too long

It ain’t nothing like the streets of God, family and values I grew up on

When I beg you not to go drink, you leave hit the liquor store again

Was my love for you not enough in the end?

 

Is it my fault you’re lost worse?

It’s hard for me to see you when you’re drunk

In the bathroom stall doortakin’ pills glassy eyes, givin’ up

You’re trying to find your friends some laughter but it’s too dark hard

Tell me how you’re getting home going to bedyou took the car “early morning”

You call text me before you’re passed out in the yard goodnight after hours on your phone

Feeling low isolated daysgetting high social media nights, where did everything go wrong?

You say that it’s the universe stressful day and blame it on the stars job

 

(Wife)

You say that it’s the universe never your fault and blame it on the stars everyone else

 (Alcoholic)

You say that it’s the universe always my fault and blame it on the stars my past

 

(Husband & Wife)

But this road you led me down is too long [neither of us can go much longer]

It ain’t nothing like the streets I grew up on [our worlds are so different]

When I beg you not to go, you leave again [he mentally checks out & I have one foot out the door]

Well, I guess I wasn’t we weren’t enough [for each other] in the end

 

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